You’re a dog and this is simply all you need/want. I mean, when you’re done you’ll freak out about a nearby car or sneak over to visit the neighbor’s dog and huff its rear end for a little bit. And I’m sure, while all that’s happening, you’ll think you’re in heaven once again. Well, I’ve got news for you, Pax: you are. You probably experience heaven on earth a few hundred times each day. If I sound angry, I apologize. It’s really just poorly channeled jealousy.
*For the record, I’m well aware that the author isn’t actually a dog. I’m kind of just using the opportunity to talk to dogs in general. The owner (who I’ll assume is the author), however, is likely just as juiced as Pax when writing these updates on his behalf. A frightening topic for another day.